I Have Difficulty Writing

Writing is something that I have always loved to do but never really felt like I was good at it. I tend to make things too complicated. I get all of these ideas while I write, the I backtrack to change the original then I have a different feelings I want to incorporate, etc. I have an especially hard time writing in a way that is genuine in the way I speak. Caroline always tells me, “Dean, if you just write it in the way you would speak it and leave out all of the unnecessary words then maybe it would feel better.”

She’s right.

Ever since I began writing and publishing whatever I write to the internet, I have shown the tendency to overwrite/overcomplicate things. Right now as I write this entry, I am nervous about choosing the right words…worrying about how people will perceive the idea…I guess what I’m trying to say is that I have expectations of myself and I feel like I do not meet those expectations in the area of writing. I never feel fully satisfied in what I write in regards to how it relates to how I feel. Does it get the point across? Is it detailed enough? Is it too detailed? Is it relevant? I can imagine everyone feels this at some point during their blogging.

What do I think it boils down to? Subject material. In school, I never had issues writing. Sometimes I wish I could post essays I’ve written for class online, but would feel way too geeky doing so. The difference is that in class, I was given parameters in which I needed to write. I was given the plan. I was given the foundation I needed to get started. With blogging, I usually just sit down and start writing. Most of the time I never finish and delete the draft because it feels forced. Forced writing is the last thing I need for my creative side.

This feels good.

Writing this entry feels good to write. I still have some anxiety about the perception of the ideas and about how it is written, but I feel that I have figured out what I need to write successful and meaningful blogs…an outline, or a plan.

I rarely use session plans in my clinical work. I go into my MT groups with the knowledge of what the group needs, and then however the group feels that day determines what interventions I facilitate. It is now obvious to me (thanks blog!) that I need to outline what it is I need to say.


2 responses

  1. At the risk of sounding like a cliche… Do what you’ve always done and channel you’re PASSION. If you hung up on the syntax check out the Grammar Girl pod casts. They are short and I lean alot form them.

  2. Well done, Dean! I have that problem, too, of wanting to come across the right way without being passive or apologetic as well as not being aggressive (or a jerk). What has helped me most recently is planning, in advance, the next 3 (or more) posts that I want to write and how I want them to fit together, or not. Then I’ve set that foundation like we had in school and I know what I want to talk about.

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